My husband and I are newlyweds and have a 15 month old son. It never fails when at church, family functions, grocery shopping, and even out to dinner we are always asked the “Million Dollar Question”. When are you having a second child? My first reaction is to say something witty and sarcastic to what I feel is a ridiculous question. But instead I smile and respectfully say “We are still getting use to the one we just had”.
Why has this become such a normal and accepted question for those who know nothing of your life to ask? If you think about it that question could really ruin someone’s day. You never know what that family has gone through to have their first child or if they don’t have children the reasoning behind that decision.
Personally after all the sleepless nights, morning sickness, back pains, two epidurals, an emergency c –section, doctor visits, emotional outburst and poopy diapers. I’m not sure if I am willing to go through that all over again because honestly I am scared.
I know many people believe that children should be close in age so they can entertain one another, but I say “what about me (the mother)?” As a first time parent my body has changed and gone through things that I could’ve never imagined and I do believe after 15 months I am still healing physically and mentally. And for a second I would like to be selfish and get back to “ME”, who I want to be as a new wife and new mother.
A lot of women are scared to admit that sometimes we lose ourselves in the process of taking care of everyone else. But we still smile and put on a brave face for those around us because motherhood is supposed to be the best job in the world. And it is, I wouldn’t trade it for the world!
One day I am sure we will add another bundle of joy to our family and I know my husband can’t wait to have a “daddy’s girl”, but at this moment I’m not ready and I’m okay with admitting that. I am really enjoying my little family and can’t imagine having to share the attention I give my son with another beautiful blessing from above.
So I ask you, do you feel the “Million Dollar Question” is appropriate? Or should everyone learn to respect a family’s privacy and instead of focusing on a child that isn’t here yet, enjoy and give all your love to the current child?